kill -9 `ps -ef |grep -i stressful_life |awk '{ print $2 }'`

We were in a meeting today and we were saying things like "If you kill the parent what will it do to the children?". Answer: "It depends on how you kill the parent" . Imagine if a non-techie strolling by happened to hear that. Would he/she think we were murderers?

If Ewa Mataya or the Jeanette Lee told me to "stroke it instead of poking it" after she watching me shoot would I get excited? ;-)


Jillians calling my name

Despite all the crap on my plate and the uncertainties in my life I'm in a playful mood. I feel like sneaking out of here to go to jillians and having a couple beers. Maybe shoot a little pool and maybe apply that stuff I've been I've been reading about... Oh jeah... solo. Practice makes perfect and I practice best on my own. Too bad sneaking out isn't a possibility, not even a remote one. Everyone is still here and you know the unspoken corporate rule: Last one to arrive in the morning should be the last one to leave. And in this case that rule applies directly to me since I creep in around noon sometimes. It's not like I put in fewer hours because everyone knows I hop on the computer as soon as I jump out of bed and knock out any urgent issues. I'm sure that's understood. But I believe in common courtesy.


Senior Social Engineer

Sometimes I wonder if I"m still a member of my wonderful group here at work because of my strong socializing skills. I mean, technically I'm just above average at best. C was definitely sharper and more experienced. We were about the same on the laziness and procrastination scales. And I'm not talking about during meetings and conference calls because you'll rarely hear a word from me in those. I'm talking about in social situations where there's alcohol involved. Catch me at the bar with coworkers I'll be a totally different person. Somehow I'll transcend my usual self. I appear more witty and confident. And honestly 'Appear' is the key word because I truly am witty and confident.. but I prefer to shut the fuck up at work. But in during a session of imbibing I'm simply awesome. I can build strong rapport with a group of people faster in one night over a few beers than it would take a coworker to build with the same group in a year. So the next time my group needs a favor from someone with whome I've partied with before, it gets done promptly and properly. It's all politics and alcohol plays a huge role. Luckily for my collegues (and myself) I possess that skillset so I'm truly an asset. Couple that with my samurai-esque UNIX and security skills I'm indispensible and irreplaceable.

Can't I have my own conspiracy theories too?