Gangsta Rap on the Decline

Jeah, I'm bored as hell waiting for my homie G to swoop me up...

What happened to lyrics like this:

If ya gal look fine ya bettah hide the bitch
Cuz if I find her imma fuck her and make her suck my dick
That goes for yo mama and yo sister too
And if I'm locked down in jail that shit might go for you

But I just laugh cuz pussy games be triflin
The legs get spread, I cut that ass like a knife then
Bust a nut on her stomach, wash my dick in the sink
And buy a 40 at the stow from the goddamn chink

UGK - Cocaine in the Back of the Ride

What happened to gangsta shit like that??

My wife tells me that she feels my daughter start moving around whenever she hears my voice. Awwwwww. Now that's priceless.

Astros Lose NLCS

Losing game 7 hurts more than any other game I can remember in recent years.

It hurts more than getting dumped or getting fired.

That damn Pujols double, then Rolen's heart-ripping HR was witnessed from the backroom at the Wood. I lost my temper for about 5 minutes, cursing loudly like a madman at the world and everything in it...

Then I took a deep breath and in a manner a zen master would approve of... I let it go.

Thank you Astros for the ride... it's been an amazing year and you exceeded all expectations. I'll love you always.

Miceli Chokes (Again), BoSox Reverse Curse

Garner, why would you even think about putting in the worst pitcher all of the majors?

Congrats to Sox fans everywhere. I wish I could feel what yall are feeling...

Tomorrow it all goes down.. Watching the game from my couch, alone, in a straightjacket.

Go Stros!!!

Stros Win on Kent's 3-run walk off HR!!! Take the lead in the series 3-2 

Typical SF Weekend

What happened this weekend reminds me of why I love San Francisco. Even on a typical laid back weekend certain stereotypes and initial impressions can get shatterred as soon as I leave the house. Friday night, I went out with my realtor and his homie. Every time I've met up with him to look at homes or sign documents he's always sporting a suit like any typical young square with a little money. So I guess you could say I was a little shocked when I jumped into the backseat and he hands me a 40 oz of King Cobra and suggests I try to kill it before we get to our destination (Club Six). My big baller realtor who owns a 600k home drinks 40's to avoid paying a premium for drinks at the club. He also makes it a point to show up early to avoid paying full cover. A little odd... but hey it's pretty fuckin cool too.

Astros tie up the series 2-2 woohoo.

Last night I had dinner drinks with a bunch of Stanford and Princeton grads... Yeah I felt a little dumb. But it's ok.. they can't pull bitches like me.

Oh.. can't forget Rueben Droughns and Detox Tea.

No Worries

Pee Wee League bullpen stabs the Astros again. Garner: Please replace Vizcaino and Ensberg with Everett and Lamb. It's obvious they will hurt us less. I'm confident we will still prevail.

M, you know.. sometimes I think I'm in love with you... then I realize it's just because you love sports. And M, please don't try to run back to me when your boyfriend gets tired of fucking you again or if you need a lock. Damn Hoe.

Oh yeah. 2008 songs on my IPOD :-)

Curse Broken

Two months ago, if someone asked me if I'd ever see my Astros win a playoff series in my lifetime I probably would've said not likely. Tonight, anything's possible... even a World Series victory vs. Boston or New York.

You see, as far as I can remember I've been a crazied Houston fan. I recall watching the 1980 NLCS vs. the Phillies with my Dad and my Grandfather. I remember crying like a little bitch when Phi Slamma Jamma lost the NCAA championship. And of course, I could never forget that heartbreaking meltdown by the Oilers in the playoffs vs. the Buffalo Bills while I was in college.

I've witnessed too many miraculous comebacks engineered by the likes of dudes like John Elway, Danny Ainge, Joe Montana, Karl Malone, etc. I've thrown pizza at TV's. I've threatened Cowboy fans with violence. I've always acted pretty fucking crazy when it came to my teams.

Not too many people outside of Houston could ever comprehend the passion, the anger, the we hold inside. We were born with a fucking monkey on our backs. We always played second fiddle to "America's team": Staubach, Emmitt Smith, their cheerleaders who were always hotter than ours. Members of the New York media insulted our beloved city by calling it "hell on earth" during Clutch City '94. And what about 43 years of no Astro playoff series wins... until now.

Yeah I know the Rockets won two titles back in the mid-nineties. I celebrated and talked so much smack back then too. Those championships were the most memorable fan experiences in my life. Afterwards, I quit being so angry. I learned that we werent really cursed. I didn't let future losses bother me as much. We were no longer cursed I believed.

Ok, now that I realize that this little essay lacks a point and I'm just rambling I better quit. I guess just I'm emotional to see the Astros finally win a playoff series. It feels amazing. I haven't been this happy about H-Town sports for 10 years...

Beat St. Louis.

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

Once again I've neglected my loyal following of fans... But don't fret, I have concrete and worthy justification for this last hiatus. I'd love to be eloquent and verbose but I'm just not in the mood nor do I have the time or patience. So please excuse my incoherent prose.


The Good:
Once again I put in another offer for a little ghetto condo in the penninsula. Not bad for the price. Definitely a good starter. Luckily I actually won this bid and all looked peachy. Until my lender gets wind of litigation against the home owners association and decides to get iffy and things get downright beauracratic. Deadlines pass, I'm suddenly in breach of contract. Life is suddenly stressful as shit.

The Bad:
In effect, due to this new 3% purchasing price of a monkey on my back I lose my head some and proceed to get into a car accident by smashing into the passenger door of a 3 series beamer who runs a red light. Although she was somewhat at fault by running a red light (maybe maybe not) the adjuster determines I'm liable since it's my duty to "carefully check any intersection before proceeding" as stated in California traffic code number 248702.3832k4. Deep inside I knew it was... but honestly I wanted some rich daddy's girl in the beamer to pay for it. :-P

Suddenly I'm more stressed than any time I could ever recall. But at the same time I'm immune to pain by now.

The Ugly:
M catches me online. Yeah we've been making a little small talk here and there. She's been amicable since her and her boyfriend got back together. We still flirt and tease one another. The sexual tension still exists but just on a lower scale. Until tonight... Tonight for some unknown reason she's especially frisky. She's expressing fantasies about our next rendezvous: Dinner, a bottle of wine, and rough sex. On top of that she says I "better not be one of those making love type of guys". Damn M, If you only knew ;-) I think she wanted me to get her off right then.. but honestly I was a little spooked with my wife in the next room. Gulp.